Question of the Day

[ayoub]

We all know a couple of the classic blunders ("Never get involved in a land war in Asia." and "Never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.")... What others can you think of?

---

Never say "Yes, you look fat in that" :P

Comments

[corporatebeach.livejournal.com]

Never say, "No, you DON'T look fat in that."

[amnotcute.livejournal.com]

"My ex wouldn't have done that..."

[bellanna.livejournal.com]

I'd actually prefer to be told that maybe something is not that flattering.

[bronxelf-ag001.livejournal.com]

Never believe that it can't get worse. It can.

[the-ravyn.livejournal.com]

Never judge a book by its cover.
Never forget past mistakes.
Never eat yellow snow.

[mighty-rontor.livejournal.com]

Never get between a Brazilian and both a soccer match and a beautiful ass.

Never ask a man, "does this make me look fat?" Fuck you. If you really have your heart in starting a fight, just punch him on the jaw anad kick his nads. At least he knows where you're coming from with that.

[soothethemuse.livejournal.com]

Ha! Good advice... LOL

[soothethemuse.livejournal.com]

Never say yes to a two year old unless you mean it! If you go back on your word, there will be hell to pay.

[mighty-rontor.livejournal.com]

Never ever watch "Miracle Dogs Too." I'd rather be mauled by bears than see that again. Do anything but that. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little again.

[paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com]

Asking: What could possibly go wrong?

Taunting: You and what army?

Calling: Antidepressants "happy pills"

Saying: Get over it to somebody grieving or hurting or suffering.

[cmerun12.livejournal.com]

NEVER pick sides in a fight between two friends.
Do NOT get involved in a fight between family members.

[mighty-rontor.livejournal.com]

Never drink to a black-out if you think highly of yourself and even think someone might have a Sharpie.

Never keep driving if your passenger is piss drunk and thinks "boy, that cool breeze feels realy good."

Never poke wolverines with a stick.

Never get off the boat. (Apocolypse Now)

Never point a gun at anything you don't intend to shoot.

Never put DeCarte before a horse.

Never divide by zero. That's for me to do.

[writer-lilies.livejournal.com]

"Tell me what you think. Be honest."

Never be honest. Especially when a teacher asks. The icon may happen.

[tribalw0lf.livejournal.com]

I like the last part. =)

[tribalw0lf.livejournal.com]

and they don't forget you said yes.

[tribalw0lf.livejournal.com]

telling the person you just had sex with that you've had better. (Liar, Liar)

Size doesn't matter.

Be careful what you say around the little ones, they repeat everything they hear! (my own experience.)

Calling your current love by your ex's name at inappropiate times. Suz's biological donor did that to his wife. She hated me for that. oops. I guess I left an impression?

The ex husband's brother and I were at costco one time...for a laugh, he asked (while I was at the end of the aisle)"do you think they sell date rape pills in bulk?" You should've seen the looks. wow. heh It was funny though.

Don't whiz on the electric fence.

Don't leave your ID at the scene of the crime.

When someone claims they've lost weight and you look at their butt and say, "I found it!"

[mac-arthur-park.livejournal.com]

No...really...it was great.

[donnickcottage.livejournal.com]

Never eat a hamburger in the company of cows.

[nonickname96.livejournal.com]

Don't be a SHEEP. Protect yourself.

Never point a gun at anything you don't intend to destroy.

Treat every gun as if it were loaded.

Only put your finger on the trigger of a gun if you intend to fire.

Everything can be said in a sexual way with the right inflection (ex: "Grandma's Chicken Saaaalad" --Joey, FRIENDS).

In that vein: Gum is NOT perfection regardless of what Chandler claims.

IF i think of more, i'll be back.

♥

Personal adage (among my friends): There is ALWAYS a small child behind Steven.

[miintikwa.livejournal.com]

Never ask the question unless you're ready for the answer.

If asked "do I look fat in this?" and they do, say "why don't you try something else on, so I have something to compare it to?"

[fox-bard.livejournal.com]

The first rule of Fight Club is that we don't talk about Fight Club.

[fox-bard.livejournal.com]

Never ever ask a woman if she's menstruating. If she is, she'll let you know, or you can find the evidence in the bathroom.

And never ask a woman how far along she is in term unless she looks like she's ready to drop that instant. And even then, use much discretion.

[deza.livejournal.com]

Never say "Sure, I've got some time. What can I do to help?"

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

:D

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

Ouch... :P