I stopped tracking my personal progress when it became apparent that the metamorphosis from being a scared rabbit of a girl to a jaded young woman was complete. So it's been a couple of years since bothering to take notice of how i've changed.
I can say with a straight face that there's been a lot of growing up involved. But there's still quite a bit more to go through.
Polygamous to Monogamous, Pagan to fairly conservative Christian, red hair to my natural brown/black, deceptively well to very sick, scared and small to curvy, determined and gaining confidence.
And I admitted to liking Cliff Richard's music. And my crush object changed from James Spader (pure sex on legs) to Stephen Fry (witty intelligence and a warm face).
It has been a bad year for me, depression of varying degree's and other problems both real and imagined. dont really want to think about ho it has changed me, i might not like what i find.
The real change has been in the last 6 months since I stopped my regular teaching job. I didn't realise until I was out of that political snake-pit how much the poisonous atmosphere was affecting my health and behaviour. I'm a lot calmer now - my blood pressure is down and I am able to speak up for the things I need and care about without getting into a complete dizzy first.
I lost a pair of best friends, got a new one (who left me later on), rekindled a friendship (one that is my best now), and starting seeing more and more of the good and bad of people...
In short, I grew out of being a wide-eyed naive kid. I grew up and learned about what was wrong with me and other people. I learned how to cope with change in myself and others; alongside that, I came to terms with the inability that I and the rest of the world have in terms of change.
So yeah, I changed like this: I GREW (not taller but yeah...).
Well, if we push it to a year and just a few months...
New job, new house in a new state. One daughter gone from girlhood to womanhood. Lost another husband (like a set of keys? lol). Further along the yogi path. New friends. New outlook on life, mostly positive. It's all good.
With the practical changes above, I think I have changed internally most by becoming the me I was supposed to be all along. It's very pleasant.
I think I have become more honest and more true to myself. Before the whole DUI incident, I never wanted to cause waves if something didn't make me happy. I'd smile and say, "That's okay" when it clearly wasn't, because I wanted to keep the peace. Now, I can be brutally honest.
i think my remainign desires to have flings has finally stopped. it took years of reconditioning but it can be done people. monogomy is just a habit afterall.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 09:32 am (UTC)I can say with a straight face that there's been a lot of growing up involved. But there's still quite a bit more to go through.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 11:34 am (UTC)And I admitted to liking Cliff Richard's music.
And my crush object changed from James Spader (pure sex on legs) to Stephen Fry (witty intelligence and a warm face).
(And I found my first grey hairs *meep*)
Yup, whole lot of changes.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 11:46 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 12:19 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 12:54 pm (UTC)In short, I grew out of being a wide-eyed naive kid. I grew up and learned about what was wrong with me and other people. I learned how to cope with change in myself and others; alongside that, I came to terms with the inability that I and the rest of the world have in terms of change.
So yeah, I changed like this: I GREW (not taller but yeah...).
(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 01:06 pm (UTC)New job, new house in a new state. One daughter gone from girlhood to womanhood. Lost another husband (like a set of keys? lol). Further along the yogi path. New friends. New outlook on life, mostly positive. It's all good.
With the practical changes above, I think I have changed internally most by becoming the me I was supposed to be all along. It's very pleasant.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 02:13 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 02:39 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 03:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-22 04:21 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-23 12:19 am (UTC)I actuality I've changed a lot! Suffering the trauma I did made a lot of this seam bigger and others seem smaller. It made me different. Good and Bad.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-23 02:18 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-11-23 03:52 am (UTC)