Question of the Day

[ayoub]

What are some of the best and worst chat up lines you've heard / used?

---

Go on, make me laugh, or cry... :P

Comments

[seegwa.livejournal.com]

Never had a chat-up line used on me... you can go ahead and cry. I do. ;)

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

So you've only been approached by classy guys!

[seegwa.livejournal.com]

No - I've never been approached at all...

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

Hey... Me neither...

[seegwa.livejournal.com]

I'll have to think of a doozy for the next time I see you. ;)

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

Cool! :D

[beatzz.livejournal.com]

Well, when I was left with a classmate of a friend, I didn't know what to say, so I blurted out the first thing I thought of, which was soooo lame. I said, "You have nice teeth."

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

LMAO!

[billzy.livejournal.com]

How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Fertilized? ;)

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

LMAO! :D

[eithnepdb.livejournal.com]

I was in a bar in Brighton and this fella walks up to me, looks me up and down and says "so, would you like to go and try and try a few things then?" :P

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

LMAO! :D

[sabotabby]

Got any Irish in you? No? Well, would you like some?

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

:D

A classic!

[libra-dragon.livejournal.com]

You make me so hot I want to to pee myself...

Some guy said told me that a bar years ago at the Mall of America. Apparently it didn't attract the smartest of folks.

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

Oh dear.... Yikes!

[alainn-mactire.livejournal.com]

Said by some jerk at the bar after a friend gave me a Cadbury's Creme Egg on a night out...

"Oh, she doesn't need that...She's got plenty of eggs inside her. And they're all MINE".

I kid you not. Needless to say we ran a mile.

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

Ouch!

[jovi-diva.livejournal.com]

Ok...well..this isn't original, but I enjoyed my response. I was about 17 and this guy used to come in McDonalds where I worked and one day he said...
"Hey baby...whass yo sign?" And he gave me this TRYING TO BE SEXY look. The fact that several of his teeth were missing and or rotten was quite the turn off and he also smelled. I answered with...
"NO TRESPASSING!"
:D

[fox-bard.livejournal.com]

That is a brilliant response! I'm going to chuckle over that one for another hour.

[jovi-diva.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I was rather proud of myself for coming up with it so quickly. The man was quite repulsive!

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

LMAO!

Well said!

[fox-bard.livejournal.com]

Usually I get addressed by a feature, like my eyes or my hair.

However, there are two pick up lines I've received in the neo-pagan fringe: "What's in your horoscope chart?" (A bit more complex than just a sign, but it amounts to the same - "I don't care what you are, but I want to fuck you anyway - at least tonight.") and "You look like a real Celtic Shaman." LMFAO!

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!

[writer-lilies.livejournal.com]

Unedited.

"You got teef in yo mouf? Smile!"

-_-

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

Yikes!

[shamrocks-13.livejournal.com]

I had this guy staring at me at McDonalds in Florida. I swear, he just stared at me. Googled eyed and stupid.

Then...

"So you hungry?"

WTF? That is it? You stare at me for three minutes, drool on your foot and ask me if I am hungry?

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!

[donnickcottage.livejournal.com]

Well? Were ya??? :p

[childeofloki.livejournal.com]

At least he didn't drool on your foot.

[the-ravyn.livejournal.com]

At a company Christmas party many years ago by a person who saw me every single damned work day:

"So...do you come here often?"

*eyeroll*

[ayoub.livejournal.com]

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

[popfiend.livejournal.com]

I told my wife "Hello."

That's pretty much the only one I ever used.

It was quite successful.

[elf-fu.livejournal.com]

For Valentines Day Cards:
My honey, my darlin'
of this I am certain
Let's get together,
do some bumpin' and squirtin'.

[donnickcottage.livejournal.com]

Anyone ever tell you you look just like Janet Reno?

[childeofloki.livejournal.com]

Me: "You like to dance?"
A girl: "Yeah."
Me: "Why don't you go dance while I talk to your friend?"

...

Me: "Is it ok if I stand next to you till it's safe back where I farted?"


...

Me: "Drink this till I'm attractive."
Her: "I'm gonna need another one."

[yndy.livejournal.com]

I can give you the one that worked 100% of the time for me and 50% or better for the guys I know...
Pardon my bluntness tho :)

"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but don't I know you?..."

[chiropteraclan.livejournal.com]

Heh, it has been so many years since anyone has chatted me up that I couldn't tell you. Honestly. And I don't use lines myself. I'm not good at just starting conversations with strangers.

[mishi-ragdoll.livejournal.com]

well, im gonna admit, i used this line to try to engage a convo!

"So, you know, there are robberies in the Dominican Republic..."

Best and Worst Chat Up Lines

[stonetalker.livejournal.com]

Worst: Do you sleep on your stomach; if not, can I?

Best: If I buy you a drink, will you smile?