Honesty should be constructive, absolutely. Otherwise, who needs opinions? If I can't truly benefit in some way from another person's opinion, I don't want to hear it. But if I can benefit and improve, as long as the opinion is not delivered in a hurtful way, I'm open to it.
Opinions delivered as purposefully hurtful are just poison. Opinions delivered in order to improve or warn of impending doom, delivered in the spirit of care from one who knows me and knows where I'm coming from, those I can appreciate even if I do not always agree with the assessment. But once the opinion is delivered, it's up to the recipient to figure out what they want to do with that information.
Off the wall example of the day (I'm just loaded with these!): Say that I'm painting a picture, and it's pretty bad... if you tell me ways I can improve it and that the picture would have a lot to gain from this or that because it is lacking something, then I would be much more open to receive that opinion. However, if you tell me that it sucks and to just stop now because I obviously have no talent, you haven't accomplished anything. Either I'll be upset and stop painting forever, or I'll blow you off in a huff. However, nothing constructive would come of it except for some potentially hurt emotions.
I should be a lawyer. I overclarify too much. ^__^
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ayoub![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2006-03-29 05:42 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-29 05:53 pm (UTC)Opinions delivered as purposefully hurtful are just poison. Opinions delivered in order to improve or warn of impending doom, delivered in the spirit of care from one who knows me and knows where I'm coming from, those I can appreciate even if I do not always agree with the assessment. But once the opinion is delivered, it's up to the recipient to figure out what they want to do with that information.
Off the wall example of the day (I'm just loaded with these!): Say that I'm painting a picture, and it's pretty bad... if you tell me ways I can improve it and that the picture would have a lot to gain from this or that because it is lacking something, then I would be much more open to receive that opinion. However, if you tell me that it sucks and to just stop now because I obviously have no talent, you haven't accomplished anything. Either I'll be upset and stop painting forever, or I'll blow you off in a huff. However, nothing constructive would come of it except for some potentially hurt emotions.
I should be a lawyer. I overclarify too much. ^__^
(no subject)
Date: 2006-03-29 06:35 pm (UTC)A very good example though :)